I should start a few years ago. I met him in what I would ca 'the prime of my life'. When things were right. It was way before I met Chris or Mike. We went out on a date or two. Tall. Handsome. Just home from the marines. We talked alot online. If we had pursued it it may have been something good. Our last date was a bittersweet one in that my innocence was still intact.
And he was very understanding.
We remained friends via the Internet .. I watched him meet his now wife. Saw their son and we kept in touch after 7 years? Maybe so. We were young. We've made plans to meet. Have our kids meet but it's not worked out. As it stands now, we talk online still. A lot. Almost always about our kids, relating parental stories and advice. He's currently an at-home dad as his wife's a nurse at a hospital burn unit. He reminds me a great deal of Chris at times. Also. I never told Chris how Jason and I met. He doesn't need to know that past. But he knows we talk now. I enjoy relating so much about our kids and having someone to talk to who understands a long day of chasing tails with a happy toddler. He's very intelligent but there's something about him that keeps me on MY side of the street, so to speak.
We never whine about our significant others or share arguments we've had.
Mostly the positive go told.
As I said. We talk via facebook chat. For hours. And I've never hid it. If I laugh and Chris asks "why?" I will share who and why. I've never erased our chats since face book auto saves them to your message archive...
But last night we were talking about how Netflix has removed 'Dexter' from it's lineup. I'd recently read that they no longer show all the seasons of certain Showtime series so as not to lose paying customers from Tv. They only offer the first two seasons to get you hooked. So we were amidst the second season of it. Today I get on to watch another and...no more Dexter was there ...I mentioned it in passing to Jason as he'd caught me online. So he proceeded to school me in downloading them for free and streaming via the playstation. He went moment by moment patiently with me. Our conversations were always fun and progressive and never inappropriate in any way. No flirting of any kind. As far as he knows, we are both married at home parents.
But as our conversation transgressed last night he went looking for a way to erase that message archive in FB. And he found it. Said he had nothing to hide but based on the fact that he was telling me how to pirate movies, if seemed safe and logical to him.
He said "archive bothers me .. It's not delete. It's put some place I don't know and fuck me with it later" truthfully it made me laugh.
In the past we made plans for him to bring his son to Jaiden's birthday party 2 weeks ago. His wife would be working. But the day before, he left me a message via facebook saying she came home sick so Jonah was at his in laws and he was cleaning so's not to get sick too.
Yesterday we made plans to meet at the local park with our hubbys and kids but my parents had her tonight so I saw no need to go. But at the end of our last talk via facebook he ended the conversation with, And has never done before, a heart.
So .. Maybe I'm reading too much into it. Maybe I'm not and he doesn't think he did anything wrong. He may just see me as a friend he talks to on the regular and feels comfortable with...
But I got scared..
And I don't know why.
Sent from my iPhone
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