A guilty pleasure

He's been dubbed 'Mr. Fantasy Pants' because its what he said it was. I claimed it was just a dream. Does he become 'Dream Lover'? lol. I don't know. But after said 'dream' he took it upon himself to text me and ask how I was. If I had slept. I welcomed the concern. The attention. No one really ever asks how I am.
He later catches up with me via Facebook, I'd noticed a girl who had left him a message on his page inquiring if he would call. I assumed she was someone who he knew back when. Her default portrayed a very booby girl with and ugly face .. Lol.
He messages me to say it's a pet peeve of his when someone not only does that but leaves a message pertaining to nothing About the post they're adding to. He erased her message or comment or whatever and deleted the girl.
But I also noticed that he changed his own default picture to the one I liked. When he did ... He texted me to say someone has recommended it. Someone = me.
The guilty part? I find myself staring at said picture far too often. It's a great picture of him. Relaxed. Slight smile. Endearing eyes. A melt-into-me pose.
Is this how it feels?
All the time? Thinking about someone else who isn't your partner?
Am I wrong for doing it and feeling guilty?
It has to be. This isn't me. I don't think about other men. I don't want anyone else but Christopher.

So why am I staring at someone else's picture so ... Not so vacantly? I'm not fantasizing about him. I don't think about him. I don't want to BE with him. So why ...

Chris tells me tonight that he loves me. It's more of a "mindy?"
"hm?"
"love you."....type thing to which I reply "I love you too baby. I tell you every day.".
"I know..."

And it's true. I do. And now he does almost every day. But it's rarely an "I love you" ... More of a "love you!" kinda thing ...
So with my obvious withdrawal from him and being lost elsewhere ... Does he know? Can he feel it?
Is my momentary guilty conscience that loud?

Sent from my iPhone